Hope, and Stuff

In my work as a self-employed fitness professional, I am constantly trying to find ways to motivate, inspire, and in any way possible encourage my clients to keep moving forward toward their goals of better health and fitness.  Many people get to the end of the year and just sort of forget about fitness and nutrition, probably because of the nature of the holiday season and probably also because they figure the new year and renewed motivation and energy for that sort of thing are right around the corner.  With my business and my clients, I'm trying to get them to look at it differently by taking the holidays head on and staying consistent throughout the holidays in trying to reach their goals so that they can get a running start on the new year and accomplish even more once 2014 rolls around.

The funny and ironic thing about this is that while I have been focusing all this energy and effort on being this way for my clients, I myself CANNOT WAIT for 2013 to be over!  This has been one of the more difficult years of my life (which is saying a lot, considering the last 5-6 years or so).  So for me, it's good riddance, 2013...shooo...get gone!

I am very thankful, however, for all that I do have and that occasionally does go right in my life.  Like most people, I found myself reflecting on that this past weekend with the Thanksgiving holiday.  I must admit, I had a hard time fully feeling the power of gratitude that I should have felt for those blessings, probably because my mind has been really consumed this year with the hardships I've been facing that have seemed to bombard me one after another.  But as I thought a little harder, I realized that there is one constant that I have to be grateful for that is always there despite - and maybe because of - all those struggles.

And that would be the concept of hope.

I realized that despite the struggles, I still find myself waking up nearly every single day pretty much full of this four-letter word stuff.  Maybe it's because at some point you sink to a depth that leaves you with no other choice but to have hope!  Or maybe I wake up every day deluded on this entrepreneurial spirit that seems to keep me filled with passion and drive to achieve these crazy dreams I have.  I don't know.  But what I do know is that I've tried my best to do the little things every day that keep me close to the gospel and that we are taught keep the Spirit close to us.  You know, the so-called "primary answers" like studying your scriptures, praying every day, attending church and serving in your calling, doing good to others, etc.  For some reason, a reason I can't pat myself on the back for because it almost feels like it isn't me that's responsible for it, when things have gotten harder these last several years, my focus on these little things seems to proportionately intensify.  Maybe that's that ol' "compelled to be humble" thing that Alma talks about.  I guess we're supposed to avoid placing ourselves in that position; in my case I wish I knew how!  But regardless, I guess I've lived to be able to say I'm thankful for the trials that push me in this direction.

Anyway, consistently doing these little things, I've observed and am now convinced, are what keep that hope alive.  Most of the struggles I'm facing aren't the kinds of trials that can be erased overnight and so I don't expect that of the Lord.  In fact, I don't want that.  I've recognized what I have gained from struggle and although it's weird to say this (for fear of being "blessed" with more!), I welcome the struggle because of how greatly I prize those gains.  Most of what I value at this stage of my life has come as a result of my most intense moments and I don't see that there could have been any other way that I could have learned those lessons and encountered those experiences, except to have the hard experiences that led to them.  But no matter how long it takes to overcome these things, with continued, renewed hope I'm armed with optimism to fight another day, every day, and figure out with faith the solutions to my own problems.

And for that reason, hope is enough.

My big little hopes :).